GARY'S WORLD: Remembering Carol, her cookies and kindness

By Gary Nelson / gnelson@crossville-chronicle.com

March 17, 2008 08:32 pm

I know I will never be able to look at peanut butter kiss cookies the same again.
That is without thinking of my friend, Carol Darling. Her big, bright contagious smile could easily infect a room full of people. She was always a joy.
Carol and her husband, Darrell, were found in their home Tuesday afternoon in the remains of a tragic house fire. Two lives lost in such a tragedy.
I was at the scene very early with the fire department and it was heartbreaking. I know I will miss Carol and sensationalizing such a tragedy isn't my intent at all.
Back when Carol made the first presentation to the Cumberland County Building and Grounds Committee, a little more than a year ago at the Art Circle Public Library, she and the library board served refreshments.
After her presentation about the library, the overcrowded conditions and the possibility and plans of a new facility, all who attended were offered coffee and cookies. An initial concept of the plan was approved.
She had made some of my favorite cookies — peanut butter with a chocolate kiss in the middle. The cookie was crisp, sweet, evenly coated with sugar and impressed with a Hershey's kiss. I thanked her and told her those cookies are my favorite.
We both loved libraries and talked about them. My mother was a high school librarian and I grew up around books everywhere. Her mother a teacher.
As the county meetings about the new library have continued over the past year, we have talked more and more about the issues, the library project and her presentations. I wrote stories for the newspaper — doing my job — and reported on the library project. Over that time Carol had always gone out of her way, making sure I had whatever information I needed to do my job and cover the story. She has always been a faithful supporter of the Crossville Chronicle.
In January of this year, Carol presented library plans to the county commission. I took a picture of her making her presentation.
She later told me she would have a picture of the plans for me on a CD that I could use with the story. I ran into her at Cracker Barrel the following weekend and she said she would get the picture to me first thing Monday morning.
I used to see her and Darrell at Cracker Barrel just about every weekend. I knew him from the bank and from the Crossville/Cumberland County Chamber of Commerce.
When I arrived at work on that Monday I found the CD with the picture she promised along with a container of peanut butter kiss cookies with a note that simply said, "Thanks, Gary."
And that was the Carol that I knew — always thinking about someone else and how she could do something nice for them. I shared the cookies with my friends at work and with my family.
This has been the hardest event I've ever had to cover working as a reporter. Not only was it such a tragedy in the general terms of two people being killed, but I personally knew both of them and saw them frequently. I dealt with Darrell on numerous occassions in the past. He was always kind. They both have done a lot for our community.
I consider Carol one of the sweetest, most generous people I have met, and a friend whom I tremendously respected. She has been so instrumental in the new library project. I can honestly say that project would not be happening right now if it wasn't for Carol and her tireless efforts.
I knew it was the Darlings' home burning when I arrived Tuesday morning, but I just assumed, hoped, and prayed that with her busy schedule, she and Darrell were not at home while their house burned. As the morning progressed and nobody could contact her, my heart sank. I honestly couldn't hold back the tears when they found her car in the garage. It just broke my heart. And then to see her dear, close friends arriving there, seeing the home burn and the tragedy unfold — it was heartbreaking.
Those images are burned into my mind.
I hugged my family like I haven't in a long time Tuesday night. You just never know what can happen.
Then, to hear about that awful letter on Thursday. It sickened me even more. It made me think again about the poor family having to go through all of this.
It is just so hard to understand this kind of tragedy. It's unthinkable and unreasonable.
All I can say is to pray for these poor girls who lost their parents, the Brown family, their friends and for our community — for we have truly lost a treasure.
Thank God you have who you have in your life. Tell your family and friends you love them and don't be afraid to give them a hug.
I saw Carol two weeks ago Tuesday night after the county budget committee meeting. I hadn't seen her in a couple of weeks. I wanted to personally thank her for leaving me those great cookies.
"Oh it was no big deal. I appreciate what you've done for us and the library," she said.
Since this has happened, so many people have told me about her generous acts of kindness and how much she will be missed. I have also been blessed with a lot of people in this community who have prayed for me in covering this tragedy. I can't say thank you enough to all of those who have thanked me and prayed for me.
I don't know for sure what happened in that home last Tuesday morning. I don't want to think about any of that, or any of the rumors, or any unfound accusations made in that awful letter.
All I want to do is remember the Carol Darling I knew — who everybody knew — the dear, sweet lady who devoted so much of her time to our community and being kind to all she met. That's who I will remember and will miss — who we will all miss.
I know I won't ever be able to think about our library without thinking of Carol.
And I know that those were some of the sweetest peanut butter kiss cookies I've ever had.
Gary Nelson is a Crossville Chronicle staffwriter. His column appears periodically. He may be reached at gnelson@crossville-chronicle.com.

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