By Jan Boston Sellers
I always enjoy a good laugh. Experts say we would all be much happier and healthier if we took the time each and every day to find something to laugh about. A friend sent me a list of words with a twist on their meanings. Please read them carefully as it may take a second for the alternative meaning to sink it.
1. Avoidable: What a bullfighter tries to do.
2. Bernadette: The act of torching a mortgage.
3. Burglarize: What a crook sees with.
4. Counterfeiters: Workers who put together kitchen cabinets.
5. Eclipse: What an English barber does for a living.
6. Heroes: What a guy in a boat does.
7. Left Bank: What the robber did with his bank of money.
8. Misty: How golfers create divets.
9. Paradox: Two physicians
10. Parasites: What you see from the top of the Eiffel Tower.
11. Pharmacist: A helper on the farm.
12. Polarize: What penguins see with.
13. Primate: Removing your spouse from in front of the television (pry-mate?)
14. Relief: What trees do in the spring
15. Rubberneck: What you do to help your wife relax.
16. Selfish: What the owner of a seafood store does.
Here is what is happening around town over the next few weeks:
Youth talent is wanted for next Thursday’s annual TAD Youth Talent Show. This yearly competition has two age brackets: 8-12 and 13-21. All types of talent are accepted. Winners in each category will receive a $100 cash prize. The winner of the 13-21 year old contest will advance to the Knoxville contest in September during the Tennessee Valley Fair. There is no charge to enter. All participants, however, must register with the TAD Center before the contest. Call the center at 456-2859 for additional information.
Spring is a week away, and with it comes the annual Relay for Life Pageant benefiting the American Cancer Society. Organizer Whitney Sidwell says the date for this year’s event is April 12 at the new B53 Church in Woodmere Mall. There are six age brackets: Baby, 2-3; Tiny Tot, 4-6 years; Little Miss Relay, 7-9 years old; Princess Relay for girls 10-12 years of age; Teen Relay for ages 13-15; and Miss Relay for girls 16-21 years of age.
Sidwell said, “This is an open pageant and a fundraiser for the 2014 Cumberland County Relay for Life. There will be a winner, first runner-up, second runner-up and most photogenic for each age group. If you would like to enter your child’s picture in the most photogenic contest, you will need to bring a 5x7 photo to submit the day of the pageant. Photo entry fee is $5. General entry fee is $35. Entry fees may be picked up at Mortgage Investors Group on 1307 West Ave.”
She also adds that all winners from last year’s contests are asked to return to the stage to crown the new winners. If you need additional information, you may call her at 200-3799 or email her at email@example.com.
Students’ art work from all of Cumberland County’s schools will be on display at the Art Circle Public Library, Crossville City Hall and the Palace Theatre during the months of March and April. The exhibits of visual art works will be featured from two galleries, sponsored by Cumberland Artisans for Creative Expression, in cooperation with the annual Youth Expo slated for April 12 at the Cumberland County Community Complex. These displays may be viewed during regular business hours.